Forget SBAC, It’s The Smarter Charter Assessment! Will You Be Proficient?

Since charters dominate education news these days (like oxygen being sucked out of a room), I thought we could replace Smarter Balanced with the Smarter Charter Assessment.  This will be a multiple choice assessment, and if you fail you go to jail (not really, but everyone will think you should but you will probably settle down the road).

Okay, here we go:

1. This charter was close to having it’s charter pulled over financial issues…

a) Academy of Dover

b) Family Foundations Academy

c) Brandywine Springs

d) All of the above

2. This charter spread the Kendall Massett love on their website cause their interim principal also sits on the board of the Delaware Charter Schools Network

a) Campus Community

b) Friere

c) Toyota Academy of The Marsh

d) Providence Creek Academy

3.  This charter was shut down by the DOE

a) Reach Academy For Girls

b) Moyer

c) Pencader

d) All of the above

4. Which State Rep. sat on the board of a failed charter application this fiscal year?

a) Trey Paradee

b) John Kowalko

c) Mike Ramone

d) Mike Matthews

5. This charter school recently had a pool donated to them by Schell Brothers…

a) Charter School of Wilmington

b) Kilroy’s Blogging Academy for Disgruntled Republicans

c) Newark Charter School

d) Sussex Academy

6. This charter’s enrollment was so low it went on formal review

a) Delaware Design Lab

b) one above and two below

c) Freire

d) Prestige Academy

7. This charter had their Christmas Party board meeting far away from the school so no parents could attend…

a) Legislative Hall

b) Odyssey Charter School

c) Academia Alonso

d) Prestige Academy

8. Tragedy struck when the sign outside their school was destroyed..

a) Gateway Lab School

b) East Side Charter

c) Positive Outcomes

d) Our Lady of Perpetual Labor Montessori Academy for Boys Charter School of Wilmington Lab of Zero Tolerance

9. This charter should probably not label an out of state residential treatment center as “employee recognition” on Delaware Online Checkbook

a) Early College High School

b) Reach Academy for Girls

c) MOT Charter School

d) Academy of Dover

10. Seven charter schools were or are under investigation by the State Auditor’s office.  We know three.  Which ones do you think are the other four?

a) Odyssey Charter

b) Thomas Edison

c) Rodel Foundation’s Vision of Schools That Lead Through Innovative Rigor

d) Delaware Academy of Public Safety & Security

11. Which charter school managed to have an employee do something bad

a) Family Foundations Academy

b) Providence Creek Academy

c) Academy of Dover

d) all of the above

*Bonus-Which of these had someone arrested?

*Bonus 2nd round-Which of these did I apply for their school board?

*Bonus 3rd round-Which of these was a blue ribbon school?

13) In Kendall Massett’s “Please don’t pass House Bill 186 cause I will have to actually do some work to do damage control” video, she mentioned three charters to use as an example of which school to pick on her online demonstration of how to use a dropdown menu (yes, this really happened..).  Of the three schools she mentioned, which has NOT had a State Auditor report come out on it?

a) Delaware Military Academy

b) Academy of Dover

c) Family Foundations Academy

d) The Mark Murphy Military Academy of No Confidence

13. This Charter Head Of School/Principal/Headmaster actually spoke in opposition of House Bill 50 at the House Education Committee meeting.  Which one was it?

a) Positive Outcomes

b) First State Montessori

c) First State Military

d) Great Oaks

14. This charter school had their head of school resign after he ruffled up a citizen outside their building:

a) Great Western

b) Dover School of Transparency & Financial Trickery

c) Freire

d) GACEC

(look, I pulled a DOE move.  I put three dumb answers in a multiple choice question so everyone will answer the “right” one giving me the results I want.  It’s like a Jedi mind trick…these aren’t the answers you’re looking for…oooo…cool!)

Okay, now that you went through this, you can consider yourself college and career ready.  Cause you won’t get your score until September 31st! But only on that day, and you have to go to the place where Governor Markell signed House Bill 50 to look at the report!  You can now compete with all the kids in Singapore because you maybe might possibly be proficient on the Smarter Charter.  I’ll give you 3 to 10 odds!  But only for the first few years…